What Christmas Means to Me...

This year I have thoroughly enjoyed putting up my imperfect but beloved Christmas decorations, buying and wrapping gifts, reading and watching Christmas stories with the boys via book or tv, and most of all soaking in what the birth of our Savior means to me... My tree... a few years back I decided I wanted to have a beautiful, perfect tree that was color coordinated with my home decor... Well, I went out shopping the clearance sales after Christmas and got all I needed for that perfect tree.. I set it up the following year and found that, well... while it was beautiful and perfect appearing on the outside, when I looked at it I didn't feel the excitement I thought I would. Rather, I felt sad and empty... Sad that I had denied my boys the opportunity to put up their handmade ornaments and those they had received over the years at ornament exchanges on the main family tree.. I had told them those would be perfect on our "playroom tree." I had put aside the boxes of family ornaments that each had a story behind them, maybe it was about the person who gave them to us, or the year we received them... but each had a story... Now they didn't all necessarily look as if they should belong on the same tree together, lots of different materials, shapes, many worn and tattered...Yet last year I decided that they were going to all be back together on the same tree, our main family tree in the living room... That was a beautiful Christmas... I so enjoyed having my boys place the ornaments anywhere they felt appropriate, as we played Christmas music, drank hot chocolate, and memories flooded my mind as to Christmases when I was a child... They were perfect, mom always made thumbprint cookies with icing, we played Christmas music and we all got to put our special ornaments wherever we thought they looked best... it was quite possibly one of my favorite Christmas memories. So this year, as I reflect on that, I look at my tree and see a masterpiece! It may not be to anyone else's eyes, but I love the ornaments, the ones who gave them to us, and the stories they tell... And I love that though some are getting tattered and worn, they are oh so beautiful when the lights hit them and it shines right though them! The lights, how I LOVE the lights... I could gaze at our lit up Christmas tree all evening... I think about the irony of how this Christmas tree is so much like our lives... at least mine... Don't know about you but for me right now my life if full of many stories... Many good and great stories of blessings the Lord has given me, yet there are also the stories of brokenness, hurt, pain, unexpected and life altering circumstances, broken and scarred family relationships.. These symbolize those ornaments that don't look so pretty alone... Yet as they are all placed on the tree exactly how and where the Lord allows them to be, IF WE ALLOW HIS LIGHT TO SHINE all around and through them, it somehow can shine through the darkness!!! And one day, maybe not now, maybe not yet for you, as it has been a process for me, I believe that we will look on our lives as I have learned to look at my beautiful Christmas tree. It is a tree that tells so many stories-some are perfect and fairy tale like, some are not so pretty and some are heartbreaking. Yet,if He is our Lord and King, He is able to shine through and around even the most painful circumstances stories. As each worn ornament has such character, so is He producing character in each of us if we cling to Him (the LIGHT) through our trials. His desire is for us to look more like HIM,and reflect his light. This can come in many different shapes and forms. For me that has meant to give up more of what I once thought was so important, that I might find and dwell on the things of eternal value. And He alone is truly beautiful and worth it, and the one constant, that will never change. ("The grass withers and the flower fades, but the word of the Lord endures forever "Isaiah 40:8). So this Christmas, I think of my friends who have many sad stories to tell-whether watching a sick child suffer, missing loved ones who have passed,missing relationships that seem to have changed forever, yearning for Christmas as it once was, or for anyone who wishes things could only be the way they used to be,battling illnesses or living daily with chronic pain or depression... No these stories are not pretty, no they are not fun at all to go through... But,when we have the light to guide us, to shine through and around us, to focus on to give us hope... I truly believe that one day,some how if not already the Lord will shine through these circumstances. My story of pain is in no way shape or form as heartbreaking as many of yours...I do not at all take lightly the depths of pain some of you have experienced or are walking through... Yet what I have been through has been life altering for me especially because I can no longer physically do the things I loved to do... It has been physically and emotionally challenging...Although my pain has been different and is minimal compared to what many of you go through, I want to tell you I have seen God shine through to me when I truly felt hopeless and in despair...This is why I share my story any chance I can... It is my hope you will see and experience the hope He offers whatever you may walk through... For those of you who don't know, I have struggled with chronic pain for years now.. 14 years of endometriosis/pelvic pain, 10 years with neck pain, and 3 1/2 with back and leg pain...The last 3 1/2 have been the toughest and the ones that have greatly interfered with life as I knew it... Not long ago I ran into a friend who I had known at the gym in my former "workout queen" days... She also has had life greatly altered by pain in the past few years... She was a dancer and practiced pilates for years and has had to give up both, as well as living with daily pain... Funny because we bump into each other frequently, and I don't believe it's by accident. I truly believe the Lord causes our paths to cross... We have very similar symptoms and will always begin by sharing how we are doing, newest remedies tried, any thing we feel is helping and may be something the other may want to consider... Then we move to the emotional part... The "I feel I can't take anymore part..." This is where I let the Lord take over and share how HE KEEPS ME GOING... HE IS MY LIGHT... I know that as of yet He has not been able to shine through her circumstances in as much as she has told me she just can't have that attitude yet...It's ok, I could not either for a while. BUT, I keep His light coming, I share scriptures, I pray for her, and I pray that one day she can allow that light to shine through the tattered and worn stories in her life...and trust that He is in control.She said that for me I have children and that must make it easier to keep going and have hope. I told her that helps but the Lord must be our focus. He is the only one who understands and will never leave us nor forsake us. He walked these roads ahead of us. That's why Christmas is so special to me.. it offers hope from THE ONLY GOD who came as a baby to walk these roads of suffering and pain, to a much greater extent than any of us have suffered or will suffer on this earth, so that we know HE UNDERSTANDS and loves us. I don't know about you, but those I find most comfort in talking to about my problems are those who have actually experienced them... Now, my mom and Jay and best friends are wonderful and love me and will do their best to comfort me, but they simply cannot understand exactly how I feel... Guess who can... HE CAN, HE DOES, HE WANTS YOU TO TRUST HIM. He is the best Christmas gift ever and if you don't know him PERSONALLY, as your best friend, as your ALL IN ALL, as your ONE YOU GO TO, as your LORD AND SAVIOR... Let him be your one and only, let him shine His light through all your stories... it's why He came... to give us hope, to offer something more than anything or one in this world can... life everlasting... eternal... where there will be no death, no pain, no suffering, we will be made new, so THAT is how I keep going in the face of suffering and how you can too...It does not make it easy, it does not mean I don't break, it just means that I have someone holding me up, walking with me, carrying me when I'm too tired to walk...listening to my prayers of tears when I can't even find the words... His name is Jesus. I'm looking quite forward to my brand new pain free life... and spending eternity with Him one day. How can I look beyond the here and now pain and still have hope she asks? First to have his hope, you have to have Him as your Savior... Ask him and let Him be your Savior. Believe that He died on the cross for our sins. Our sins deserve punishment and would bring death, were it not for His sacrifice. (Romans 3:23 For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God." and Romans 6:23 For the wages of sin is death; but the GIFT OF GOD is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord). But know that your acceptance of His payment on the cross is the only way your sins can be forgiven. He has given the gift, it's up to you to tell him you accept it. (Romans 1:9 If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.) And then he ROSE, He is a LIVING GOD who wants to live with you, "Immanuel"=God with us...we don't have to do this crazy life alone...Romans 8:38-39 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present, not the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Then know this life is not it, it's not all there is...know that this is a tiny sliver of what is to come if we know Him and believe we will one day have eternal life with Him... Then live for that.. to share His hope with others...we all so need Him. What do you mean by a personal relationship with a God you cannot see? Here's how you can get to know Him more... get in His word, pray daily,throughout your day... talk to Him about your struggles, Pour out your heart... It's ok if you're angry and bitter,I have been too... just tell Him... Just let Him be there for you and He will...I always think a great place to get started in the word when you are struggling is the Psalms. It will not take long when you are doing these things to understand exactly what I mean... God will reveal his heart to you...Lastly, memorize scripture! You never know when you may be presented an opportunity to encourage someone who needs it... Time and time again I have been encouraged by a dear friend texting or emailing or quoting me scripture... It is such a powerful tool... Not long ago the Lord laid it on my heart to memorize this passage... I was able to share this scripture with my friend that morning that has so encouraged me many of mornings... 1 Corinthians 4:16-18 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary struggles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." This verse speaks to her as it does me...We hug, we cry, she says please keep praying for me and I ask the same of her for me... We laugh and say we will bump into each other again soon, and I hope we will... Merry Christmas to all of you and it's my hope that if you don't know Him personally as your Savior, you will accept the best and most meaningful gift ever given, right now... He is THE LIGHT...Will you let Him be yours and will you let his love SHINE through your stories? So many verses are found in God's Word about the light... here are a just a handful...and just a few of the reasons I love Him... Psalm 36:9 "For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light." Psalm 47:3 "Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me; let them bring me to your holy mountain, to the place where you live." Psalm 89:15 "Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, O Lord." Psalm 119:105 "Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path." Psalm 119:130 "The unfolding of your words gives light, it gives understanding to the simple." Luke 11:33-35 "No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead he puts it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light. Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are good, your whole body is full of light. But when they are bad, your body also is full of darkness. See to it then that the light within you is not darkness." Romans 13:12 "The night is almost over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light." Matthew 5:13-16 "You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father which is in Heaven."